The quiet anxiety affecting most people in France

Money Worries, Shaky Sleep, Fragile Relationships: a huge new survey hints at a quiet mental health storm in France.

Across the country, thousands of respondents have lifted the veil on how they really feel, far from social media smiles and polite small talk.

The survey that put words on a silent malaise

A large-scale sociological survey, conducted alongside a European cultural festival with broadcaster Arte as a partner, asked a simple question: “How are you, really?” More than 13,000 people have already answered, offering a snapshot of France’s emotional climate right now.

The backdrop feels heavy. Politics look unstable. The climate crisis fuels a steady sense of danger. The pandemic left scars on bodies, finances, and relationships. Against that backdrop, mental health complaints keep rising. Public data suggests that each year, about one in five people in France experiences a psychological disorder, from depression to anxiety to more severe conditions.

Among respondents, a clear pattern emerges: anxiety is no longer an exception; it is part of everyday life.

The survey serves as a rough emotional thermometer. About 9% of participants say they feel “at the end of their rope.” Another 5% say they are “living their best life.” Most fall somewhere in between, handling day-to-day ups and downs with a low but steady level of tension.

What French people fear most right now

Participants also answered a more specific prompt: “Right now, what worries me most in my life is…”. Their choices sketch an unexpected map of private fears.

• 11% say their main worry is money.
• 12% point to work.
• 14% worry primarily about their health.
• 19% say their love life troubles them most.

Behind inflation and job insecurity, emotional life comes first. Romantic relationships weigh more heavily than paychecks in many minds. That does not mean financial distress has disappeared. Instead, it shows how strongly people tie their sense of stability to the state of their relationship-or their hope of finding one.

Love life emerges as the number one personal concern, ahead of money, work, and health.

Beyond these individual areas, 23% of respondents say they feel anxious about their future overall. They struggle to picture the next five or ten years clearly. Long-term planning-buying a home, having children, changing careers-starts to feel less like a plan and more like a risk.

Who people talk to when things fall apart

The survey also shows how people seek support. When something goes wrong, many do not suffer entirely in silence-they just choose their confidants carefully.

Person they talk to	Share of respondents
Friends	57%
Romantic partner	40%
Therapist or psychologist	32%
Parents	20%

Friends lead by a wide margin. The traditional couple comes second. About a third say they rely on a therapist, suggesting that mental health care has become more common in everyday life and has shed some of its former stigma. Parents rank last by far, reflecting a generational shift: many younger adults feel more comfortable opening up sideways-to peers-than upward to family.

The hidden anxiety behind love and relationships

Love appears both as a desire and a source of worry. Psychologists describe this tension as structural: we look to partners for comfort, understanding, and a sense of worth. When those expectations collide with reality, unease rises.

Clinical experts interviewed in connection with the survey note that, in most couples, a partner plays a “complementary object” role. Consciously or not, people expect them to anticipate needs, calm fears, soften blows to self-esteem, and sometimes even repair older emotional wounds. That unspoken contract rarely gets stated clearly, leaving plenty of room for disappointment.

The more we expect love to fix everything, the more fragile the relationship feels when real life shows up.

Seven recurring fears tied to romantic life

Relationship specialists describe recurring worries that show up again and again in therapy. They can appear at every stage of love, from first contact to long-term commitment.

• The first contact: Anxiety about calling or texting back, fear of seeming “too eager,” or reading silence as rejection.
• The first night: Doubts about body image, sexual performance, or whether intimacy will change the dynamic.
• The early relationship: Uncertainty about labels: Is this casual, serious, exclusive, temporary?
• Cohabitation: Fear of losing personal space, or clashing over habits, schedules, and household chores.
• Values and beliefs: Tension around politics, money, parenting styles, or life priorities.
• Shared investments: Hesitation about buying property, having children, or combining finances.
• The long run: Questions about whether desire will fade, whether partners will “grow apart,” or whether crises can be weathered.

These worries do not necessarily signal illness. Many therapists consider them part of a “healthy” emotional life, as long as they remain manageable and open to discussion. They can indicate that someone cares about the relationship and what it means.

Problems begin when fear drives decisions. That can look like emotional dependence, constant jealousy, inability to tolerate distance-or, on the other end of the spectrum, repeated sabotage and withdrawal at the first hint of intimacy.

When anxiety crosses the line

The survey does not diagnose disorders, but its findings echo broader mental health data. Persistent anxiety about love, money, or the future usually stops being “normal” when three simple conditions come together:

• Worry shows up almost every day.
• It disrupts sleep, work, friendships, or health.
• Attempts to change habits or circumstances do not relieve it.

In those cases, professionals often point to generalized anxiety, depressive states, or trauma responses. These conditions can feed on social tension-economic insecurity, climate dread, political conflict. They also thrive in silence, when people feel they have to handle everything alone.

Behind the statistics are very ordinary lives: parents awake at night, students stuck in worry loops, couples arguing over tiny details that conceal bigger fears.

How this French snapshot mirrors a wider Western trend

While the survey focuses on France, similar signals appear across Europe, the UK, and the US. Young adults report worse mental health than older generations. Loneliness spreads even in large cities. Dating apps multiply choices but not necessarily connection. Social media amplifies comparison, especially around careers and relationships.

In Britain, national health data shows rising rates of anxiety and depression, especially among women and people under 35. In the US, polls show a growing share of adults who say they feel “nervous, anxious, or on edge” most days. The triggers differ somewhat by country-health care costs in America, job security in parts of Europe-but the emotional pattern looks familiar.

From silent anxiety to practical steps

Studies like Arte’s survey do not solve the problem. They do something more modest, but still valuable: they put a name to it. When people see that nearly one in five respondents worries most about their love life, or that almost a quarter struggle to imagine their future, their fear can feel less like personal failure and more like a shared condition.

For readers who recognize themselves in these figures, several practical paths exist:

• Track patterns: Noting when anxiety peaks-during messaging, before bed, after arguments-helps separate triggers from vague dread.
• Change one habit at a time: Cutting down on late-night scrolling, alcohol, or caffeine can gradually lower baseline tension.
• Use conversation as a tool: Raising specific topics with a partner-money, sex, the future-can break through unspoken fears.
• Seek neutral ground: Talking with a therapist, coach, or support group can provide distance that friends cannot always offer.

Some mental health teams in France are now testing digital tools and group workshops that combine psychoeducation with practical exercises-breathing techniques, communication drills, role-playing future scenarios. These low-barrier options are designed for people who feel too intimidated, or too busy, to start traditional therapy.

For policymakers, this kind of data raises broader questions: how to adapt urban planning to reduce loneliness; how to design workplace rules that curb burnout; how to integrate mental health education into schools, including emotional literacy and relationship skills. The quiet anxiety captured in this survey is not only about individual well-being. It shapes voting behavior, productivity, birth rates, and how societies respond to collective shocks.